Are you growing?

As a new grandmother, I am amazed as I watch the growth of this new little person. Everytime I see him, he has grown and expanded in wonderful ways. His physical growth continues according to a deep, physioligical calendar. And it has caused me to wonder, what about personal growth?

For many years, I was privileged to be a part of an international organization that valued personal growth, and it has become a habit of my life to consider my mental, physical, social and spiritual growth. Every year I had goals in each of these areas. But recently, as I have experienced a family crisis, I have begun to think of these areas of growth in new ways. As I have been faced with unexpected disasters, I began to ask God for direction in pursuing areas of personal growth. While I was still reeling from the emotional effects of our current family situation, I began to look for resources to help me navigate this new and uncharted path of my life. I joined a Bible study with other women who were recovering from various personal traumas. Our weekly meetings were like gold to me as we had mined the truth of Scripture and shared how we applied these truths to our new path of life. We shared what we had read and of the help we had received. We talked about relationships, our thoughts, our reactions and our victories along the way, as well as many failures. We learned to give ourselves grace as we were tempted to want to apply everything at once. We developed deep social and spiritual connections that have given us support in our journeys.

How is your personal growth? Do you have friends who are committed to help you on your journey? Have you recently experienced a personal crisis, and how has your personal growth been affected by your situation, and by your supportive friends? What have you been reading that has contributed to your personal growth?

I am looking forward to hearing from you,

Warmly,
Darla

Whatever happened to fun?

What happens to fun as we grow up?

Having lived in a family filled with fun and laughter, I expected it to just remain an integral part of my life. In my early career years, I loved my work and had many friends who loved fun as much as I did. Living with 4 roommates in a home, we added fun to our everyday lives. Every weekend there were invitations to go skiing (living 1 hour away from Banff made this irresistible), potluck dinner parties with inventive themes, movie nights, and the hard-to-resist shopping marathons. As a new wife, I recall fun times being a natural ingredient in our marriage - lots of laughter and light-hearted moments.

When the children were young it was my dream 'job', celebrating life and laughter with these little enjoyable ones. Every day was an adventure.

I first noticed fun leaking out of our lives a few years later, as parental responsibilities became more challenging, and the stresses of life began pressing in. It happened without me noticing, until the day I heard my psychologist friend say, “The number one need of business and professional women is fun.” That just stopped me in my tracks. (and I happen to believe that it's the #1 need of all women). As I reflected on my friend's statement, I came to believe it was true of me. I agreed with her that I had been trying to nurture everyone else in my life, without nurturing myself. I had indeed depleted my resources, and there was precious little energy left, and no fun.
I began to resolutely put fun back into my life, and that of my family's.

When our daughter was going through a rough time, I promised to put so much fun into our lives that I hoped 'she wouldn't be able to stand it'! She started horseback riding lessons, and as I watched from outside the paddock, I observed her build a unique and special rapport with her horse. It was magic to watch her, and it added to her self esteem as well as adding fun to her days. We started going to a craft class in our small town, where we would spend an hour or 2 being taught a craft and walking out with the finished product. Soon the craft table was filled with women and their daughters (many of whom were friends we had recruited) We reinstated family nights for silly games and funny movies. We began camping together...certainly more fun for the kids, but I was game.

I also invited a group of women to a lunch one day. They were acquaintances from our church who I never had the time to get to know. We began a monthly lunch group at each others' homes, and called it 'The Fun Lunch Group.' It nurtured us every month - many laughs, and some tears as we grew very close and shared the ups and downs of life.

My older brother and I share jokes by email - he lives far away and I only see him once each year, but these laughs keep us close. My Mom and I also share a great sense of humour. We took a trip to Italy together and expected to have fun, but we turned into Lucy and Ethel, with a new and funny adventure every day.

Is there fun in your daily life? What things are fun for you?
I wonder if this is partly a generational issue - my 20 something daughter seems to have a lot of fun with little effort - is it easier for women under 40?
Are you able to take time out for things you think of as fun without feeling guilty?

Please let me hear from you - I speak to women of all ages, and would love to hear your comments.

Yours in Fun,
Darla

Women need fun!

A psychologist friend of mine told me that the top need of women today is fun. Does that surprise you? Apparently, as women, we are very good at nurturing everyone else at our expense. Are you working hard to put fun into your life this summer?

Do you build personal time into your summer schedule? How is it working for you?

Enjoy your summer!
Darla